Friends

To who it may concern
I haven't the skills of relationship
that soft interpretation of the unsaids
got lost when I wasn't allowed
to be a friend

I was confined to surmount circumstances
make up for choices
define another before I knew
who I was
or if I liked her

I had imagination
friends who listened with creativity
walked boldly into my dreams
held my hand
and waited for my smile

Nobody saw them but me
They escaped
left me to fight the words of high school boys
disfiguring my frame
on a daily

Friend became this telephone distant
only defendable
when it's not punitive
failing
fallacy

I cried for acceptance
but was given awards
trophies collect dust
and are painful
to hug

If you choose me,
I own my imperfectly human
desire to stay starry eyed
to find more than disappointment
in being a friend.